I've been wandering around aimlessly for the past month or so. Not that I haven't had anything to do; I've had plenty to do. I have to finish editing my dissertation. I have some papers to write for various things. I have lesson plans to update. I have a house to clean. I have books to read. I have movies and TV shows to watch. I have scrapbooking, genealogy, and numerous hobbies to get back into.

So, it's not that I have nothing to *do*. It's more that I have nothing to *look forward to*. I had a long-term goal for a very long time, and now that I've reached it, I keep thinking, "Now what?"

I've written about this before, so I won't belabor the issue.

And I've also written about some goals that I have, but none of them seemed to be enough. I am looking for something *more*.

So I've decided to concentrate on one goal. It is a long-term goal, has many components, and will not be easy to accomplish. I want to adopt a child.

This is something I've wanted to do ever since I can remember. I have wanted to do this much more than I have wanted to get married or have "my own" (read: natural) children or even get a doctorate. So now I'm going to plan for it.

Now, this is going to take a lot more than just *wanting* to adopt. In fact, several of my other goals will have to be put into place before I can accomplish this.

First, I need to be financially stable. This means that I need to have a good job and reduce a great deal of my debt. This is going to take some time and energy, I know, but it will be great for me in many ways.

Second, I need a better place to live. Either I need to get my house all fixed up or I need to move. I would like to do both, just in case. But at any rate, I need a much better place to live. And I'll be happier once both happen.

Third, I need to be healthier. Since going on the insulin, I have learned how to control my blood sugar. I'm a lot healthier than I was a year ago, and I'm getting the care that I need. But I need to lose weight and still be even more healthy. So that means I need to start exercising. A LOT. And eating better. I know I can do it; I just need a better plan, I think.

So that's it. The Goal. This may take 3 years. Or more. But at least now I have a goal.

Graduation was 8 days ago, and people continue to ask me "what's next?" As if this is just a means to an end and not something that I want to revel in for a while. Nevertheless, I do have to think about my future, and so I have compiled a list of goals, mostly long-term, for my life...

(1) A new job. I like my job. It is interesting and fun. But the drive is annoying, there is really no chance of doing anything other than what I do, and being a math teacher in an art school means I will never been anyone's mentor. I want to be a mentor to teachers and an advisor to education policy-makers. Is that so much to ask? I think I deserve to have something good happen to me finally.

(2) No more debt. This is going to take a while, I know. I am still trying to dig out from the failed business venture. But if (1) works, then (2) will come slowly.

(3) A clean house. This is a huge project and has been a long time coming. Every time I feel like I'm making a dent in things, it just gets worse. I need to get this house cleaned up and fixed up. (And then I can throw a huge party!)

(4) My own house. OK, this is going to take a long time. Either (1) has to be spectacular, or I have to win the lottery. But I want a house. A really awesome house. :)

(5) Adoption. With a house and a job, I can finally achieve my dream of adoption. Enough said.

(6) Marriage. I know that you are wondering why this is at the end of my list. It just is.

I also have some short-term goals. Publication, Summer Institute, AERA, a book. Another party. Maybe a vacation. An actual date.

So I'm asking for your prayers. Because these are not things that I take lightly. Thanks in advance.